Time Rider’s Shtuff for Bikers has a pile of incredible products available on their website, http://www.ShtuffForBikers.com. This month’s product review will cover Knob Polish, a metal cleaner and polish that is, in my opinion, revolutionary. Strong words? Not as strong as this product. I tried Knob Polish on my pipes, mirrors, and chrome. Wonderful, easy to apply, easy to wipe off, sterling results…just what you would expect, right?
THEN I polished my gas tank, my saddlebags, and my helmet with the SAME polish. Yep, you heard me right, I used metal polish on painted surfaces with the same sterling results. This shtuff does NOT harm painted surfaces. Surprised? I then went to my clear plastic lower deflectors and removed tiny paint spots picked up from roadway paint…and my deflectors are clear and unspoiled as MORE
All About Motorcycle Bikes
26
Dec
A Present to My Readers! (AP Photo/Scholastic Inc.)
On May 12, 2009, I published my first article as your Baltimore Motorcycle Travel Examiner: “Hey Baltimore, Welcome to the Ride!” Since then, I’ve published 81 other articles that have been viewed over 75,000 times!
Writing this column has been a wonderful experience for me. I’ve corresponded with a lot of good people and I’ve made quite a few new friends. John and Monica Tartufo introduced me to Steve Wallach and ETA Travel’s Motorcycle Cruises. These good folks inspired an entire series of articles, including “Motorcycle Cruises, Take Your Motorcycle on a Caribbean Cruise” and “ETA Travel and the History of Motorcycle Cruising.” A fellow RiderCoach told me about the Ephrata First Sunday Breakfast, where I met Merv Hill, a great guy and the President of the Ephrata American Legion Post #429. Grant Parsons, editor of American Motorcyclist Magazine and his assistant, Nora McDonald read, enjoyed and reprinted my daughter Lauren’s article “Freedom, You’re the Passenger” in their magazine. I will forever be grateful for the confidence they helped instill in Lauren! Michael D’Elia of BikerHiWay and Vance Lane of Time Rider, Shtuff for Bikes have been instrumental in providing test products for several articles. I’ve also had a lot of support from other Motorcycle Examiner’s, including: Mark Poesch, the DC Motorcycle Travel Examiner, Patty Davis, the National Motorcycle Travel Examiner and Ken Bingenheimer, the National Motorcycle Examiner.
However, mostly, I’d like to thank you, my readers. Without you, my work would have no purpose. Your feedback, comments and loyalty truly make my efforts worthwhile.
As a small token of my appreciation, I’ve teamed with Vance Lane of the “Time Rider, Shtuff for Bikers” website to provide my readers 15% off the price of any products on the Time Rider website! This discount is valid for the remainder of 2009. To receive the discount, use the Coupon Code “BaltoMCTvlr” when checking out on the Time Rider site. Thanks to Vance for his generosity and thanks again to you, my loyal readers.
I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Tom Bachur
Baltimore Motorcycle Travel Examiner
23
Dec
What George (Sandollar Road Captain) wanted was this. He wanted to know EXACTLY where Wyatt’s bike had burned on LA 105 during the final scene of Easy Rider. I’d heard it was more
30
Nov
So what is the perfect gift for your motorcycle rider and how do you select it. This can be especially difficult if you’re not a biker. There are a multitude of items you can give that biker and they range from a few dollars to thousands of dollars. This is, of course, nothing you don’t already know but what we are going to attempt to do, is give you some direction, a way to figure out the gift that will make their day! The information given here is basic and written more for the non rider trying to buy the rider a gift but once you get through the basics this can even help a rider find their way towards the perfect gift.
A gift is by its very nature, a surprise and the best way to figure out how to surprise someone is to know them and what they want. The ultimate way to find this out; is to spy on them, talk to their biker friends, listen closely for little hints. You might want to elist the help of a co conspiriter. Try to develop a short list by weeding out the impossible and improbable. When you get the short list done, see if there is something on that list that they really want and you can afford.
If spying isn’t an option then the following list of how to come up with the perfect motorcycle gift is the way to go. By answering the next 10 questions as thoroughly as possible you should have a good idea about the right gift for your Biker.
1) What type of personality does your biker have? Do they appreciate a good joke. In other words if they were picking out a sun block for themselves would they get a 30 SPF cream called “Coppertone” or would they prefer a 30 SPF spray called “Red Neck Repellent”? This will determine if a serious or funny gift is appropriate.
2) What type of bike do they ride, is it a a Sport Bike (ride position is leaning over the bike, Racer type, Crotch Rocket, Ninja) or do they ride a Cruiser (ride position is upright, chrome headlights, speedometer on tank, floor boards)? This will determine the look and style of any accessory or even clothing that would be appropriate for that type of rider. With all parts & accessories, you will need to know the make, year and model of the motorcycle.
3) Do they love chrome or do they prefer colored or blacked out parts? Again, this is very important when selecting the look and style of the accessory.
4) Do they wear full leathers, a full face helmet, A leather jacket, gloves, jeans, a t-shirt, ½ shell helmet or no helmet at all? The style of what they wear is just as important as the fit. The inherent problem with clothes is the fit. Different manufactures fit differently. If you can trick your biker into trying on the same make ahead of time, this is the best. If not, keep that receipt because they may need a re size.
5) Do they have tattoos? Do they have a favorite tatoo artist? Do they have a favorite tatoo parlor? Think gift certificate and you might want to pick them up an aloe product like “Red Neck Reverter” The name is funny and the aloe inside is the best.
6) Do they talk about how fast it’ll go or how pretty it is? Could be the difference between a new exhaust muffler for design and sound or a new exhaust system for air flow.
7) Do they work on their own bike or send it out to be fixed? Consider this as part of the cost. If they are a do it yourselfer and have the appropriate skills & tools then they’ll prefer to do it themselves. If not, you might consider getting a gift certificate for the installation as part of the gift
Do they take day trips or multi day tours? This will again determine the type of accessories or equipment you get for the bike. A piece that deals with storage would be very appropiate for the tourer whereas, not so good, for the day tripper.
9) Are they male or female? Young or older? Who do they ride with? These all come into play when selecting the best gift.
10) Lastly, How much do you want to spend?
The options are virtually limitless and always keep in mind, if you are purchasing clothing and vehicle specific parts, you will need the appropriate information. Gloves, sun glasses and helmets should all be fitted because they are just like any other item of clothing, the actual size & fit depend on the manufacturer. Even sun glasses, if they are a little big they can blow off and if they’re too tight they will rub a sore spot above your ear. If they have tattoos, sleeveless or tank top might be the best way to go. The one great thing about clothes is, they are returnable and if you bought them over the internet or at a store be sure to keep the gift recipient so if necessary they can always go back and hopefully find the exact thing they want.
Motorcycle parts or accessories can be either generic (one size fits all), type specific (cruiser / sport), brand specific (Harley, Honda, Victory) or model specific (Ultra Classic, ZX-14, VTX). You will need specific information to buy these parts. They can be easy to install or they can be a royal pain. The most important thing here is the accuracy of your information. Be prepared to answer questions like make, model, year, CC’s/CI, and options. This is also the time to note if your biker will work on things themselves or will they take it to a shop. Make sure whatever part you buy is able to be returned for a refund because a store credit may not offer a big enough selection. Be careful about electronic parts, many are not returnable.
The easiest gifts to purchase for your biker are the generic ones. These items take the least spying and usually less money than the above listed items. They are the one size fits all type of product and once again your options are limitless: biker gift kits, helmet stick ons, patches, models, hats, bracelets, necklaces, motorcycle polish, earrings, decals, biker skin protection, bifocal reader sunglasses, belt buckles, t-shirts, shoe jewelry, biker hand cleaner and biker pain relief products.
24
Nov
Many years ago, on a cold December night, a crusty old biker was returning from a trip to Mexico with his saddlebags filled with toys and other assorted trinkets for the kids at a group home near where he worked.
As he rode along that night thinking how lucky he had been in life, having a loving riding partner that understood his need to roam the highways and to his trusty old pan that hadn’t let him down once in the many years they had shared the road together.
Well about 40 miles north of the border, in the high desert, lurked a small group of notorious little critters known as road gremlins. You know, the ones who always leave little obstacles like, one shoe, boards, and pieces of old tires on the road, and also dig those dreaded potholes for bikers to run over and crash, thus giving the road gremlins a chance to rejoice over their acts of evil.
Well, as the lone wolf of a biker rounded a curve that moonlit night, the gremlins ambushed him, causing him to crash to the asphalt and skid before coming to a stop next to one of his saddlebags that had broken free. As he lay there, unable to move, the road gremlins made their way towards him. Well, this biker, not being one to give up, started throwing things at the gremlins as they approached him. Finally, with nothing else to throw but a bell, he started ringing it in hopes to scare off the dirty little gremlins.
About a half a mile away, camped in the desert, were two bikers sitting around the campfire talking about their day’s ride, and the freedom of the wind blowing in their faces as they rode across this vast country. In the stillness of the night air they heard what sounded to them like church bells ringing, and upon investigating, found the old biker lying along the roadside with the gremlins about to get him. Needless to say, being part of the biker brotherhood, they preceded to ward off the gremlins until the last ran off into the night.
Being grateful to the two bikers, the old road dog offered to pay them for their help, but as all true bikers do, they refused to accept any type of payment from him. Not being one to let a good deed go unnoticed, the old biker cut two pieces of leather from his saddlebags tassels and tied a bell to each one. He then placed them on each of the biker’s motorcycles, as near to the ground as possible. The tired, old road warrior then told the two travelers that with those bells placed on their bikes, they would be protected from the road gremlins and that if ever in trouble, just ring the bell and a fellow biker will come to their aid.
So, whenever you see a biker with a bell, you know that he has been blessed with the most important thing in life—friendship from a fellow biker.
The Purpose of the Guardian® Bell
Many of us have heard the story about Evil Road Spirits. They are little gremlins that live on your bike. They love to ride, and they’re also responsible for most of your bike’s problems. Sometimes your turn signals refuse to work; your battery goes dead, the clutch needs adjustment, or any of several hundred things that can go wrong. These problems are caused by Evil Road Spirits.
Evil Road Spirits can’t live in the presence of the bell, because they get trapped in the hollow of the bell. Among other things, their hearing is supersensitive, so the constant ringing of the bell and the confined space drives them insane. They lose their grip and eventually fall to the roadway. Have you ever wondered how potholes are formed? The bell has served its purpose.
If you pick up a Guardian® Bell of your own, the magic will work, but if your bell is given to you, the power is doubled, and you know that somewhere you have a special friend helping to look after you.
So, if you have a friend who doesn’t have a bell, why not give them one? It’s a nice feeling for the recipient to know you care. The bell, plus a good preventive maintenance program by the bikes owner, will help eliminate Evil Road Spirits.
Polishing the Guardian® Bell
It has been a tradition among some of us for a long time to attach a brass bell to our left swing arm, to remember our brothers and sisters who have gone down riding.
It’s a small thing, but the reason a brass bell is chosen is that, as we ride, it gets dirty and tarnished. Every time we get down to wash and polish it, we are reminded of friends lost, and our thoughts turn to the meaning of being in the wind.
As we ride and hear the bell ring, we know that our brothers and sisters are riding with us, and how easy it would be to join them with a single mistake.
And maybe, just maybe, the next time a situation comes up; they will be there to help us…as long as we remember them by polishing the bell.
The best bell polisher is the all purpose motorcycle polish “Knob Polish“, It shines up chrome, plastic, aluminum, paint, brass, helmets, stainless, silver & gold. It’s not just for knobs anymore!
Story from Helmets Etc, author unknown.
18
Nov
If you ride a motorcycle, you know about “The Wave”. “The Wave” is your rolling connection to the biker brother & sisterhood, but is there a special secret to this wave? When you started riding did you seek out a wave master and perhaps copy theirs, or did you develop one of your own? Have you ever wondered if you’re wave appropriate? Do you wonder if the wave you’re flashing is politically correct, not brand specific enough or old and outdated? Unfortunately, wave training is not covered in the basic or advanced motorcycle safety classes.
Many riders believe there was a secret wave society similar to the Priere de Sion formed around 1903 when that first HD rolled out of that shed, but there wasn’t. It all started, one day in 1904 when Arthur Davidson passed by William Harley and since they knew each other, they waved. Well, another biker saw the two “Kings of Motorcycles” doing this and thought this was a biker necessity and the tradition was born. The waving tradition continued on through the years and became haphazard. There were bikers doing the “Bye Grandma Wave”, others doing the “Howdy Wave” and still others doing the extremely feminine “Princess Wave”. In 1946, after several years of these, image destroying gestures, a group of crusty old bikers decided to put some proper waving rules in place and formed the Wave Hard And True – Biker Society. Abbreviated: WHAT-BS
To wave or not to wave, that is the question. We’ve all faced that critical mass state when we felt obligated to wave but then became unsure. The worrying starts and then there’s that overwhelming feeling of guilt. Well, worry no more; here are some general waving rules to help guide you : 1)interstate; unnecessary, 2) in a curve; unnecessary 3) in the rain or at night; unnecessary 4) on a mellow two lane; proper. 5) a highway with little traffic; proper 6) A rally, unnecessary and 7) in traffic, unnecessary. There are, however, times when not waving is just down right rude. So if you’re not a jackass, when you are presented with “The Wave” you should, if at all possible, reciprocate. If it’s the proper place and time and you receive no reciprocal wave, don’t get your panties in a bunch and think you’ve just passed a jackass, because there are some acceptable reasons. These reasons are as follows: 1) you weren’t seen, 2) clutch manipulation or 3) a head nod was substituted.
There are 5 basic waves 1) the left-handed low wave, 2) the left-handed straight out wave, 3) the left-handed high wave 4) the right-handed (ha, ha, I have cruise control) wave and 5) the left-handed forward wave. The variations of these waves are as varied as the bikers & the bikes they drive, but there are some basic rules.
1) Left-handed low wave, sometimes called the Harley or cruiser wave. Typically seen used on cruiser style or custom chopped motorcycles. The arm is fully extended and aimed down towards the street in a 45 or lesser degree angle with the extension of either one, two, three or five fingers. The direction of the palm is also critical to the look and feel of this wave. The palm must either face the other rider or face the road. A classic variation of the finger positioning is throwing a peace sign (Duce) or thumbs up. To low wave with an angle greater than 45 degrees and/or with the palm facing up or back and/or with the use of 4 fingers is telling the biker community at large that you are either new or inept. If you have a cruiser and can’t get this wave to work for you, then consider the Left-Handed straight out wave or trading out your bike.
2) Left-handed straight out wave is an all around general wave. Typically seen used on crotch rockets, cruisers, customs and baggers alike. The arm can be either fully or partially extended with no more than a 10 degree angle higher or lower than the shoulder. The palm must be facing the oncoming rider in either a horizontal or vertical position and a full palm must be shown. It is suggested you present the hand in a relaxed state, as flattening it will make you look like a dork. The classic variations of the peace sign (duce) or thumbs up are also acceptable. If practiced, this is one of the easiest waves to master and will work with all bikes. If for some reason you can’t get this wave to work, you will probably have serious problems with the kickstand dynamic and should immediately sell your motorcycle before you cause yourself anymore embarrassment!
3) Left-handed high wave is a variation of the typical wave seen made by kings and kids alike. Mostly used by upright riders of crotch rockets and baggers. The elbow is kept even or slightly lower than shoulder height. The elbow should be bent at about a 75 – 85 degree angle with a slight forward angling of the forearm. The palm must be facing the oncoming rider and the hand can either remain still or the use of a side to side motion is acceptable. This wave has been proven very useful when you have a loose watchband. It is suggested you present the hand in a relaxed state, as once again, flattening it will make you appear to be a dork. The classic variations of the peace sign (duce) or thumbs up are frowned upon when using this type of wave. it’s a bit too over the top. Important: Should you be riding a crotch rocket, it is extremely important to maintain the image by using this wave only if the left hand is coming from the left hip or thigh. This should never, ever be used when coming from the handlebars. Warning of possible injury: Do not use this type of wave on a cruiser. You will appear aloof, snobbish and everyone will hate you! If you have a medical condition or feel you must use this type of wave, get a bagger or ride a crotch rocket only in the upright position and don’t be a dick about it. There are rules!
4) Right-handed (ha, ha, I have cruise control) wave. This is an occasional use wave by bagger riders. Typically seen being employed by Ultra Classic and Goldwing riders. They’re riding on rolling living room sofas. These big, comfy and not really coooool bikes are great for touring. This lack of coolness can cause a temporary condition known as “Dickishness” which can be instantly healed by passing a cruiser giving the right hand wave. The general message being sent is “You might be on a cool bike but damn it, I’m comfy”. If the rider of the touring bike is a smoker he will typically light up a cigarette or a cigar, just to drive that point home.
5) Left-handed forward wave. This wave is solely used by crotch rocket riders because, let’s face it, what the hell else can they do in that position? A flashed wave, is almost imperceptible due to the speed of the wave and the bike. To execute this wave one must slightly raise the left hand from the grip, no more than 3 or 4 inches, show the palm and return to the grip. This entire motion must be fluid and executed in under three seconds. You must learn all the intricacies of this wave before you take your first ride. If you don’t, they will know you’re a newbie and you’ll instantly become pink slip bait. The only way to avoid this lame wave stigma is by doing something crazy like riding a wheelie while naked. If you don’t fall off, that’s a big plus!
The last and probably most important part of the wave is the hand you’re using to wave. You’ll want to care for that hand because without it; How do you expect to wave? Get some of the Time Rider’s Shtuff For Bikers; Crack & Crevice Cleaner (body & bike cleaner)to clean that hand up and some Totally Awesome Crap (liquid glove) to protect it
When approaching another biker always remember to maintain the rule of “The Wave”, you never know who’s watching! The Time Rider
4
Nov
Get a Mechanic Shtuff gift kit for your do it yourselfer. It contains: a hand protectant which will protect their hands from harsh chemicals and odors, a waterless hand cleaner which will leave hands clean & soothed and an all purpose motorcycle polish which cleans, restores and protects chrome, aluminum, plastic, brass, gold, silver and paint.
With this gift kit or five others to choose from, there is sure to be a Shtuff For Bikers gift kit that’s perfect for your biker. If you’re looking for the perfect gift for your biker check out the kit offerings at Shtuff For Bikers.
At Shtuff For Bikers; The containers have funny names and directions which will keep your biker laughing and high quality concentrated products inside that will keep them thanking you, over & over again.
25
Oct
Are you looking for the perfect gift for a Motorcycle Rider? Time Rider Shtuff For Bikers has the perfect gift. Wether you are looking for a do it yourselfer gift or a gift to help the rider that always comes back with a sunburn, Shtuff For Bikers has the perfect gift for you. If your biker has a good sense of humor you need to check out the Shtuff For Bikers web site where you’ll find “Red Neck Repellent” and “Knob Polish” but don’t let the funny names fool you, These are serious products.
So If you know an old fart biker that needs a gift, get them some “Old Fart Spray“. If you know a totally awesome biker, they deserve some “Totally Awesome Crap“.
Shtuff For Bikers gives you the biker products that have Funny Biker Names they’ll love & show off to others.
